A group of us have joined a writing project on the best of 2009. It was organized by Daniel Scocco at www.dailyblogtips.com. For me, the greatest blessing was the financial crisis, letting us know there is more to happiness than money. With all of the challenges of the year, one of the biggest has been the confirmation that really makes us happy may be our bonding, our relationships with each other, our families and communities. Indeed, research has demonstrated that once basic needs our met, a continued emphasis on money may lead to anxiety and depression. Actually, releasing the emphasis on materialism can make you feel stronger and happier.

This year when my family has gathered for reunions and holidays, we have combined our celebrations with a “Giving .” For me, it has been one of the most gratifying experiences of the year. I had a “Giving” on Black Friday after Thanksgiving. We also had one for my mother this summer. Whoever hosts gets to host the “Giving.” As with many people, I have had collections of stuff that has been piling up for years in the hidden corners and rooms. My giving was centered on my library, where I had extra books that I had accumulated and not looked at for at least 10 years. Within two hours the room was magically transformed. All of the unused books were donated to charity. The recipients were most delighted to distribute them to others. It was a great joy to experience the teamwork, to feel productive, and the freeing power of letting go. The following are a few tips on what we found to make a “Giving” a success.

1. Sit down together as a group and discuss the vision of that you want. Our family wanted more time together, pleasant surroundings, more space to converse and visit.

2. Develop an awareness of what a materialistic lifestyle really costs and decide what you really want. Look at places where you can make donations and the good it will do. For example, we discovered that donations of old shoes could help drill water wells in Africa.

3. Among those who are interested, discuss and release any blocks to effective teamwork. Often, these result from past beliefs about the function of stuff. For example, they could be beliefs such as “Stuff is love,” “releasing stuff will leave you deprived,” and you need stuff to support you. We like use a simple forgiveness technique to release old collective beliefs. Talking about the early origins and limits of these beliefs helps to establish compassion.

4. Develop a plan that honors your strengths. Let all contribute. One of the strengths we found critically important, was the strengths of gender. This summer, my sisters and I did a great job of gathering the pile to be reduced but did not make any headway until we had the men help us to line up the steps on where to focus to get the result we wanted. Their physical strength was critical for the heavy lifting. We also honored personal strengths, and the freedom for them to be expressed. For example, one of my sisters performed an Indian Sundance ritual before the Giving. One of my brothers hosted a dinner celebration afterwards. Another served as a coordinator.

5. Set a limited time where you plan to do the work. As long as you have a general plan, let Go of doing it any one way. Let people contribute as they wish.

6. When done, celebrate what you have done. Ask each member what made them the most happy. We discovered, we enjoyed the family teamwork, creating a new vision for our lives, giving to those who could use it, and feeling productive.

7. Then give thanks for all that you have, smile, and pass your happiness on.